by Elisabeth | Dec 2, 2020 | Defenders, Dissociation, Recovery, Relationships
I’ve spent my life on defense. Every decision I have made was to avoid some bad thing. I’ve rarely made decisions for a better, fun or authentic life. That was a luxury I didn’t feel I had. I chose the safest route. I chose the approach that avoided risk. Why? ...
by Elisabeth | Nov 11, 2020 | Defenders, Recovery, Relationships
It’s been a little more than two weeks since the big move and my inner conversation has been intense. I definitely moved here to help with calming my inner system, but I knew the initial response would be anything but calm. So this isn’t very surprising. Even the...
by Elisabeth | Oct 28, 2020 | Defenders, Dissociation, Recovery
I have had a hell of a week. I packed up our belongings while throwing half of them away, loaded the other half in a POD, put 6 months of essentials in a rental SUV (quite a big one), and drove 12 hours to a furnished house I had never seen before (other than the...
by Elisabeth | Oct 14, 2020 | Defenders, Dissociation, Relationships
I grew up in a world where help came in two forms. It was non-existent. Or it was a betrayal disguised as help. My abusers made it clear that I was not going to find help. Each time I tried to find help, it was thwarted. Each time I had optimism, that optimism...
by Elisabeth | Sep 30, 2020 | Defenders, Dissociation, Recovery, Trauma In Society
We live in a world filled with fear. And right now, it might seem like it is worse than it has ever been. Fear is everywhere. There is fear of disease, fear of financial destitution and fear of oppression and attacks on our human rights. They are widespread right...
by Elisabeth | Sep 16, 2020 | Defenders, Dissociation, Recovery, Relationships
We are living in a scary time. It is hard for everyone. But after childhood trauma, it can paralyze us. We already have inner parts who are programmed to find the fear in everything. We learned this survival skill at a very young age. Now that the world around us...
