I have been sick the past few days.  I shouldn’t complain.  It has been years since I have been sick.  I used to get sick every three months before I started this recovery work.  As a matter of a fact, when I became a single mother, my greatest fear was handling my children alone while sick.  But what I have come to understand is most married mothers are handling their children alone while sick.  So in general, motherhood while sick is going to be extremely difficult.  But my children are older now.  And I can rest more now.  There are certainly downsides to having tweens, but rest time is available.  But there is a holiday in America tomorrow.  If there is one thing I have learned, holidays were not created to give rest to mothers.  In my opinion, Thanksgiving is the least restful holiday.

My inner system has something to say right now.  I can tell I am opening up in new ways to my authenticity.  This process is scaring the hell out of my defenders.  And they are fighting back.  Hence the illness.  Yes.  Our parts and their emotional blocks make us sick.  That is one of the earliest recovery lessons I learned.  I also learned that processing these blocks can make us feel better.  But it’s not easy to do.  When we are tired and sick, we really don’t want to use any energy for emotional expression.  But I have been processing these blocks anyway.  One of the reasons I am successful at teaching this work is that I am doing this work.  That is some of the best motivation there is.  I know that whatever I learn, I can bring to my clients.

What I am learning from my karma kid is not necessarily new, but it is a new level.  I am continuously amazed at how our lives were orchestrated to build obstacles in the way of our most authentic lives.  I do not see this as an evil or malicious attempt to annihilate our most authentic selves (although if you do, I understand that sentiment).  I have come to see this as our journey.  I now see a purposeful life as a journey through the obstacles created by our past so we can be who we are.  Unlike the linear understanding that we must complete recovery before we live a purposeful life (a controller view), I have come to understand that this work is a part of purpose, a part of life.  We are here to move toward authenticity.  It truly is our life’s work.

But how?  It seems like the cards are stacked against us.  And they are.  But when we get how this works and can bring awareness to those obstacles, we can get the upper hand on them.  What do they look like?  Here are some ways I have seen this play out in my own life.

Obstacles show up as guilt and shame.  Oppression comes in many forms, but when people in communities and families have become convinced they cannot achieve their own dreams, they aren’t going to be supportive of ours.  They have learned that following dreams is a selfish endeavor.  They have shut down their own hope for an authentic life.  So they will naturally project that on to us.  And this will start at a young age.  To be authentic, we must be willing to question all the guilt-ridden messages from others about how life is supposed to work.  Start by asking yourself if it is really selfish to do what you love.

Obstacles manifest as apparent external problems.  When we grow up listening to scarcity-based beliefs, our brains are wired to see external problems as impassible.  But external problems are there to be questioned.  If you cannot find the support from others to follow your dreams, ask yourself if you need it.  If you don’t have the time to manifest your greatest vision, ask yourself if you can manifest the first step.  If you don’t have the money to go “all in” right now, ask yourself what you can get done with the money you have now (even if it is nothing).  These external problems stop you because the defenders want to be stopped.  Start by asking yourself if it is really an obstacle.

Obstacles live in the unconscious.  One of the biggest obstacles to our purpose is that we don’t remember what is stopping us.  We were taught to see the world a certain way and it lives in our unconscious.  It rules our lives.  One of the most important steps we can take in our purpose is to look for where we are stuck.  If we are not moving in a certain area of our lives, there are unconscious beliefs stopping us.  Start by asking how you believe you cannot achieve your purpose.  Try writing from the answer.

Obstacles can appear magical.  When it comes to karma kid, it is important to consider how our beliefs might be magical in nature.  It is one thing to defy the majority of the human population who believes purpose is selfish and unattainable.  It is an entirely different scale to believe the universe is against your plans too.  Start by asking how you might believe you are up against a powerful magical force.  Bringing this understanding to light can have a major impact on moving forward.

If we can see obstacles for what they are and take the time to understand why they are there, we can methodically move them out.  If we learn to question our beliefs and bring awareness to the unconscious, we can build the ability to move past these blocks and manifest our most authentic life.  It is a long journey.  It is a life-long journey.  But as we move through these obstacles, we will see life open up to us in ways we never imagined.  The next time an obstacle makes itself known, take the time to question it.  You will find it was meant to be overcome.