I Have the Power Now

I Have the Power Now

I’ve spent my life on defense.  Every decision I have made was to avoid some bad thing.  I’ve rarely made decisions for a better, fun or authentic life.  That was a luxury I didn’t feel I had.  I chose the safest route.  I chose the approach that avoided risk.  Why? ...
How Control Works

How Control Works

Apparently, I sent an unusual email to a client the other day.  I was referring to a new understanding about an inner part and how they were impacted by my dad.  The client wrote back and said, “There’s a word I don’t ever hear you say: ‘dad’.”  I was a little...
I Am Not Shocked

I Am Not Shocked

I usually don’t write about current events.  I do that on purpose.  I want to keep the focus on recovery.  Too much focus on current events can be triggering.  Triggers can be helpful in recovery by giving us access to our emotions, but they can also shut us down if...
Change is Here

Change is Here

Generational Skills When I was in my 20’s, people were always telling me I should be a lawyer. They told me I argued well. They told me I used logic well. In reality, I never listened to the other side. I was too busy formulating my response. And when things got...
The Storm Inside

The Storm Inside

I have worked hard to maintain my mask of normalcy over the years. I was trained by my family that there could be no external signs of abuse, physically or behaviorally. And since I was convinced the abuse was my fault, I thought it imperative to comply. When I felt...