by Elisabeth | Feb 26, 2020 | Defenders, Dissociation, Inner Children, Recovery, Relationships
Relationships after trauma can feel like a mine field. There is no telling where the next explosion will come from. And our emotional responses to relationship patterns can be so intense, it feels impossible to unravel. But we keep going back to relationships. ...
by Elisabeth | Feb 12, 2020 | Defenders
When we start our recovery journey, our controllers have big plans. We are going to find the right approach and helper the first time. We are going to find the shortest distance between point A and point B. We are going to work hard because we are good at that. We...
by Elisabeth | Feb 5, 2020 | Defenders, Recovery, Relationships
Toxic shame is one of the most detrimental epidemics in a world filled with childhood trauma. But it isn’t easy to see. It is often heavily defended by our dissociation, anger and futility. It is hidden under our defenses like anxiety, depression and addiction. ...
by Elisabeth | Jan 29, 2020 | Defenders, Freedom Fighters, Inner Children, Recovery
My trauma led me to understand emotions in a one-dimensional way: “bad”. They do come in two forms of “bad” though. There are emotions that are a bit uncomfortable, but tolerable. I can power through them and still function even if I am exhausted at the end of the...
by Elisabeth | Jan 22, 2020 | Defenders, Dissociation, Inner Children
There is no single emotion that drives our world today, but if I had to choose the most impactful, I would choose fear. Fear is the most prevalent emotion on this planet and most of our decision making is driven by it. But we don’t know this is happening. We don’t...
by Elisabeth | Jan 15, 2020 | Defenders
I’ve been working with some intense battles in my system lately. I have a tendency to focus on my defenders when I am feeling blocked and I often discuss them in my writing. To be fair, the defender fears of recovery and change are not the only inner obstacles we...
